Platformers live or die by the joy of movement. The game’s bosses are intense, which makes landing phase-changing hits like this all the more satisfying. Many tracks are enhanced by some excellent use of samples, and as you’ll come to see this is just one of the many ways the game reinvents preexisting material to achieve its own, fresh ends. Each level gets its own unique track and they’re as varied as the game itself.
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This is coupled with a soundtrack so packed full of earworms that you’ll need to take a prescription for it. Peppino in particular is the most authentic depiction of anxiety ever created, constantly freaking out and visibly shaky even when smiling, which is not an especially common occurrence for the poor bastard. Buttery smooth animations on everything that never stutter or look any less than hand-drawn, absurd amounts of detail, sprites squashing and stretching all over the place. The first point of sensory overload is the game’s presentation. I don’t claim to fully know or even be correct on all the things I recognized or perceived as recognizable and it doesn’t really matter – my point is that if you’ve ever played a platformer something here will activate your neurons, but the game throws so much at you so quickly that you’ll barely be able to process it. Others were direct or debatable references: Bubsy, Plok, Skullmonkeys, and I’m going to mention Mort the Chicken again because I still can’t believe it.
Some were by direct mechanical homage: Sonic, Donkey Kong Country, Kirby, Megaman Zero, Mort the goddamned Chicken, and tons more.
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I saw shades of over a dozen other games or series I recognized. This game was made by devs with an immense amount of knowledge of the genre in its totality. What immediately became clear to me is that while Pizza Tower is certainly a “Wario-like”, it isn’t just that. The titular tower must be toppled, and you’re just the Italians to do it. The goal was never objectivity – there’s no such thing as an objective opinion – I just wanted to see the game for what it actually was without the specter of hype looming over it. I knew I had to play this, and more importantly I knew I had to go in as blind as possible to reasonably evaluate it. So I avoided the demos, the Kickstarter, the growing fandom, everything leading up to Pizza Tower’s release. Whenever you’re told on loop that something’s going to be The Greatest Noun To Ever Verb it’s not unreasonable to be skeptical, especially if you happen to have 100s of hours in the exact franchise it’s claiming to be reincarnating. That Peppino Spaghetti is the harbinger of good platforming, here to bring us to the promised land of body slams and HURRY UP level end sequences. A lot of digital ink has been spilt about how Pizza Tower is the true second coming of our lord and savior Wario. This isn’t just an excuse to talk about that time I played every Wario game again, this is the rare case where bona fides actually matter a bit.
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